Everyday is a new challenge. My will is being tested regularly. Sometimes I want to give in, to be “normal”…I never thought of myself as much of an outsider, but as I get older the world seems so grim and uncaring. I don’t want to be a part of that reality. This is not to say that I want to live with rose colored glasses, but I always thought things were suppose to get better not worse…
Anyway, so the grind goes on. The squeezing of creative juices, coughing up ideas, and sorting out the trash from the gems.
Yes, the grind goes on.
So, today I will drill some pieces in the hopes of forming some jewelry people will clamor for. I will paint a painting that express some part of my subconscious. I will wonder if I made the right decision. I will wonder when my work will pay off. I fret about how much longer I can go on being a ‘starving’ artist..living off of the good will of my relatives. Perhaps they believe in my dream more than I do.
As I grind forward, I must let go of my doubt. I must welcome hope and possibility and prosperity.